Adventures of Yesterday

I met someone special a little over a year ago. Special people look ordinary at first. My mom always told me that everyone is special to someone, you just have to take the time to discover it. (Oh what a wise woman.) They are almost like diamonds in the rough: you have to spend the time polishing and cutting and digging them out before they shine and you see such a magnificent worth. I saw a little glimmer in the rough and low and behold, a year later, I have a diamond!

He was quiet, and appeared to be shy. But, in the kind of environment we were in, shyness was at the mercy of the public. There would be none. He was quick in wit and well-rehearsed in many subjects. His face was young, but his mind was wise. By looking at him, you would not see any of it unless he spoke. He was handsome and strong, and had the most charming smile. His laugh was contagious and his eyes captivating. He intrigued me. 

Intrigued as I was, curiosity set in. I had to know more, but I tried to keep my distance. No luck. I was drawn in. He started the transformation from Mr. Ordinary to Mr. Special. I’d look forward to talking to him to see what he had to say or what his opinions were. I liked to hear his stories, what he liked, or random conversation. There was never a dull moment and I had missed that interaction with others more than anything. I was tired of the same old “hey, how are you?” cheap talk that I did with others just to pass the time. He took the time to get to know me and let me see what he was like, something that I took to heart.

We began dating. I hadn’t felt this happy in a long time. He filled up the empty spaces that I had and exceeded the expectations I had set (which were pretty damn low…) He treated me like a princess. Texts, calls, fun adventures; my life was a little more than complete. I felt full-filled and for the first time in a long time, I felt like I was moving forward in my life. I was changing! He had been there, done that so I listened intently to his stories to learn from his past. I learned of friendship and daring adventures he had. I encountered his soft side as well. He was so well-rounded, it almost made you wonder if such a man could really possibly exist?

But, here I am at a eleven o’clock at night on a lonely Wednesday night writing a post about this Mr. Special and the story line is not some fairytale as I would want. And, it hardly has an answer for my question. I have make-up stream-lined down my face and a heavy heart. My phone is silent and the pictures on my wall smile evilly back at me with pleasant memories. It’s almost like a tease. I wish I was the smiling girl in the photo, but alas, I am the one writing this post, aren’t I? 

A simple text remains stuck in my head: “Idk if I should be taking this.” Reading that made my heart sink. A little piece of my world crumbled. Sure, we all have our fair share of problems and incredible moments, but moments of uncertainty rock the boat more than the two combined. I am left sitting in a dull room, pondering the fate of Mr. Special that is left in his hands, uninfluenced by my stories and pleas and wishes. 

I am a firm believer that people come along to change you; to influence us, for better or for worse and to alter our lives. Some stay for a short period time, and some stay for a life time. These people endure pain with us, laugh with us, love with us, feel anger with us, cry with us… the list could go on and on. How long they are there is well… the beauty of the unknown and the twisted wishes of fate. Many of us hate fate for they take away some people a little too soon. Others, relish in the fate of encountering people that are so full of the good things in life that it is hard not to jump up and down and sing happy songs. People come, people go. No matter what, it definitely changes the flow.

And so, I sit and wait and hope you’ll be one to stay.